Saturday, May 16, 2009

Fortress of Solitude

If you've ever heard of Superman, then you probably know about his Fortress of Solitude. No idea what I'm talking about? I'll explain. The Fortress of Solitude (FOS) is this really cool pad that Superman created for when he needed a little "me" time. I'm sure that being a superhero, he needed to decompress from time to time. It must be exhausting kicking-ass 24/7 right? Or maybe it was just his escape from Lois Lane when she was being a nag (she always seemed kinda bitchy to me), or when the pressures of the Daily Planet were too much, or maybe just to get away from Jimmy Olsen (who I think was secretly in love with Clark Kent). Or it could have been to contimplate being surrounded by morons who couldn't tell that Clark Kent and Superman were the same person. I mean seriously people, a pair of glasses isn't a very sophisticated disguise - get a clue.

OK, I'm going off topic...this isn't about Superman, it's about his FOS. Which brings me to my point. I need one, badly. I'll admit I'm not crazy about his choice of location, a cold and dark place covered with ice and snow. The whole time I'd be thinking "it's so freaking cold, I need to get out of here". Maybe his cape was super-insulated? My FOS would have to be some place warm, an island in the Caribbean perhaps? Of course, I'd style mine up a little (I know that "less is more", but c'mon Superman you couldn't spring for a sofa?). I'd add a comfy reading chair, a nice lamp, some soothing art work, lots of candles. You get the picture right?

I realize I'm no superhero. I can't stop a speeding bullet. I can't even prevent myself from getting a paper cut, but does that make me any less deserving?

Lately I feel like my life is so hectic. The whole single mom thing can be exhausting at times. Doing all the shopping, the laundry, the cooking, the clean-up, helping with homework, arguing with the boy because he'd rather play video games then clean up his room. Has anyone figured out the cure for 15-year-old-laziness? If so, please share.

Work is insane and recently my boss has decided to stalk me. He lives in Wisconsin, so I am constantly bombarded with emails and phone calls every time he has a thought. My "to do" list is like 8 pages long and just keeps growing. Meanwhile, I have 3 books that I've been wanting to read, but lately (and I swear it's an old age thing) I can't read more than one chapter before I start falling asleep. So at this rate, I'll be finishing book one of three sometime in the year 2011. I'm always making a cake or cookies for someone and presently my house looks like a bomb went off in my living room.

I know what you're thinking. Stop your whining, right? Now I'm not that self absorbed, I do realize there are people who are far busier than I am and who lead an even more hectic life than I do. For example, I don't know how Sharon has the energy to get up in the morning. That chick goes non-stop. On top of being a mother, a wife, a social planner, a chauffeur, a charity fund-raiser, a gourmet cook, and a business partner she's writing a novel (not to mention the few short stories she's written in between). Honestly, I think she's an alien.

Yeah, I get that everyone is busy. But this isn't about them, it's about me. So back off, you're just adding to my stress. :)

I think we all need a Fortress of Solitude. So I'm on a quest to find mine. I know I'll find it and no, I will not tell you where it is. Superman didn't share his secret location and neither will I. Well, that isn't totally accurate. He did bring Lois Lane back to his FOS in hopes of getting lucky (although I'm not sure he thought that plan through, doesn't it shrink in the cold?). Truth be told, Sharon will probably figure it out. She can usually read my mind, which further proves my alien theory.

1 comment:

Amy Sue Nathan said...

Oh my goodness this is what I need, my own FOS. No ice though, I don't like the cold.