Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Should Be...


It's not that I procrastinate. I really don't.

I'm a List Maker with a capital "L".

And I derive intense pleasure from crossing off each and every little thing on that list.

But there are days when the nagging voice in my head that closely resembles my own (hey at least it doesn't sound like my mother, can you imagine???) reminds me that what I am doing is not constructive, productive, accumalative, creative or any other word ending in -ive.

Right now?

What I am doing - posting to the blog I've neglected.

What I should be doing - performance reviews for employees.

Earlier this morning?

What I was doing - sleeping.

What I should have been doing - working out.

Last night?

What I was doing - watching American Idol and eating Moose Tracks ice cream while curled up with Ziggy.

What I should have been doing - lease comparisons, website updates, revising spreadsheets, reports, reports, reports. Oh and some reports.

Not to say I'm a slacker. Far from it. But there are some days that I shift priorities away from what I should be doing to what I want to be doing.

I'm thinking today might be one of those days. So if we happen to cross paths and you catch me (gasp!) reading a book in the middle of the day or taking a walk that doesn't remotely increase my heart rate please don't stare and point and cover your gaping mouth with your hand in horror. No need to make me feel guilty for my lack of accomplishment - the voice in my head is right there with me, mocking me as I bake cookies for no reason whatsoever.

Listen, before you get all this-isn't-the-Sharon-I-know-and-who-or-what-has-possessed-her-body on me, take a step back. Don't call the freak police just yet - even when I'm not Type A on the outside, it doesn't come without excessive self-induced guilt. Trust me on this. The Type A on the inside won't let this leisurely creature exist for very long. I'll be back to my driven, over-achieving, list-making, goal-setting, schedule-adhering self before long.

But for right now I am now going to sit and stare at a wall and dream of a day when the stars will align, all will be right in the world and if I'm very, very lucky, what I want to do and what I am doing will turn out to be exactly the same thing.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Herredon:

Today's blog reminds me of the song from Jesus Christ, Superstar "let the world turn without me tonight".

Know who sings that?

Jesus.

If it's ok for Jesus to relax, it's ok for you.

One of my favorite sayings is "doing nothing IS doing something". I live by that. Mornings awakening with cat cuddles and duck calls. Daze of leisurely gazing out windows and just enjoying existing.

Living ~ ah, it's my very favorite thing to do!

Anonymous said...

It's called a good work/family/faith life balance! Good for you!
- Carolyn

Tahereh said...

ahaha. you're cute.

funny post!

Anonymous said...

I love this blog!!!!

Lisa and Laura said...

What am I doing? Catching up on blogs.

What should I be doing? Writing the next chapter in our WIP.

I'm such a slacker.