Friday, October 22, 2010

The Rope


Ever think about what kind of an employee you have working for you?

Give them some rope.
 

From my point of view, there are four types of employees.

1 - The Interpreter.

This employee will rise to the challenge. They will do things to this rope you didn't think humanly possible.

None of which remotely resemble what you'd like them to do with the rope.

2 - The Hanger

Enough said?

3 - The OverAchiever

A true star among employees, not only will this employee tie the rope, she will weave it into a hammock. She will purchase more rope, creating a desk, a fax machine and a life-sized portrait of your dog. She will implement a rope-tying seminar for those less fortunate.

She'll write books entitled "Rope Tying for Dummies", "Who Moved My Rope?" and "Me, Myself and The Rope: A Candid Portrayal of Mysteries in the Workplace".

She will win the Nobel Peace Prize for her work. She will dedicate the award to you.

4 - The Evaluator. This employee will gaze at the rope for hours. With hostility. Why is this rope on my desk? Stupid rope. Is this supposed to be my rope? After much rope-staring, he'll inventory nearby other cubicles. Who else has rope? Is their rope bigger?

H
e'll review his job description. Visit HR. Email counterparts in other departments. Other companies.
He'll start a spreadsheet evaluating the time it will take to tie this rope. How he wouldn't necessarily object to rope-tying. If in fact he is compensated more for it. Assuming of course that there is also a title change.

C
orporate counsel advises you to remove the rope from his desk.

He'll feel singled out, ostracized from his cubicle counterparts. Mocked and abandoned.
Ultimately he will require paid time off due to rope-stress.


Which type of employee do you have?

What would you do with the rope?

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

AWESOME!

Woman in Love said...

hmmmm pretty sure I'm The OverAchiever but I wish I were The Interpreter!!!

Good article & sincere congratulations on your new blog look & feel. Good article, good changes!

AD said...

But if your employee is a hanger...and you provided the rope...is that a workers comp issue?

Lori said...

funny the timing of this. today we were looking at new pre-employment tests. I forwarded that to my boss and told her we don't need fancy tests. we just need rope.
Lori

Little Ms J said...

I think I've been every one of these employees at some time in my career. For me it depended on the boss. If they were micro manager types I was the worst employee they ever had. If they gave me enough rope to hang myself? I would weave them a larger bottom line.

Anonymous said...

HHmmmm....not sure which employee I would be. Seems like there is an over abundance of "hangers" and to few "overachievers".
Love the new look SB!

Debby@Just Breathe said...

Thank you for stopping over today. I am following you now. I would be the OverAchiever!
At least I use to be when I was working.

Sharon Kendrew said...

I think I'd start off as one and finish off as another... good thing I don't work for anyone else, right?

Thank you all for stopping by and checking out the new look!